I’ve been thinking a lot lately about my comfort zone and how I probably would have stayed in it FOREVER if I’d never started my business. BB (before business) I was someone who didn’t really get out a ton, kept the same small circle of friends, and stayed pretty close to home at all times. My little truck had very few miles on it because I just didn’t really go anywhere! The craziest thing I did back when I was in my late teens/early 20s was probably letting John move in five months after we’d started dating. And if I’m real about that decision, it wasn’t because I was adventurous or rebellious or anything like that…it was because I was lonely living by myself at 20 years old and I wanted John to be around all the time. So yeah, I keep things pretty tame. I mean, I’m 25 years old and I haven’t been to a real concert.

Before the business, I was the type of person who watched others ask for the things that I wanted in life and actually get them. I saw people living these amazing lives…traveling, making lots of new friends, going off to college, and just experiencing all kinds of things I felt weren’t within my reach. I felt that those people deserved them and I didn’t. Or that even if I tried I would fail, so why bother? I sat on the sidelines a lot and just assumed that I wasn’t the type of person who could ever do this or be that. I didn’t think I could be what I wanted to be, wear certain trends, or ever be known for anything other than being that sometimes weird Asian girl.

Fast forward to a couple years after starting my business and giving myself permission to chase my dream, and I still struggle with pushing myself out of my comfort zone at times. For example, in the next couple days I’m leaving for WPPI and that kind of scares me because I get easily overwhelmed by tons of new people that I don’t know. It’s also the first time I’ve ever traveled by myself and only the second time I’ve flown on an airplane since I was five years old! I’m already kind of homesick for John and Lucy…even though I haven’t left yet! I also think I’m scared that I will let myself down at WPPI. That I will have opportunities to say hello or have conversations with people that I follow or really look up to and I won’t say anything to them because I’m too scared to approach them. Or that somehow the experience will get away from me because I’m too afraid or not willing to get out of my comfort zone. That things will pass me by because I still feel like that awkward, sometimes weird Asian.

I’m REALLY willing that not to happen though because I want 2013 to be the year that I step outside of my comfort zone. The year that I try new things even if I fail horribly. I want this to be the year that I own each one of my decisions proudly and am forgiving of myself when I’m not perfect. I’m going to have to keep myself accountable though, otherwise I feel like I might be tempted to sit in the hotel room and watch tv with a bag of chips in my hand. Because for real, that’s my comfort zone. HA.

Sidenote: If you’re a photographer and you see me at WPPI, please come up and say hi to me!! Also, if you see me and say hi, please tell me my bangs are not tragic. GRACIAS!

A week or so ago I tried my very first red lipstick. Just the smallest little step outside of my comfort zone, but also very big for me because I NEVER wear anything on my lips, not even chapstick. I had bare lips at my wedding! I think I always thought I couldn’t wear red lipstick…or really any lipstick at all, but I like how I see myself with it on. I feel like I’m brave enough and bold enough to take on anything!